Congratulations! You have been selected for a follow-up appointment at an upcoming Jeopardy! contestant search for the Chicago area, exclusively for those who successfully passed the online test. This is the next step in becoming a Jeopardy! contestant. We have reserved the following appointment for you:
When: Saturday, June 7th Time: 11:30am
Where: Chicago, IL
Finally! A chance to put my penchant for absorbing ludicrous volumes of trivial information to some constructive purpose!
It's just too bad that my staggering physical ugliness and dyspeptic personality almost certainly guarantee that I won't actually get on television...