Belle wrote:I asked for help here & thought I'd find compassion???
That's not actually what happened, at all. And as for compassion, I'm with those who believe your 11-year old stepson is due more than anyone else in the situation. If you were really thrust into the role of 24/7 caregiver (kid showed up and dad left town for two weeks?), then that's a beef with your husband, not this kid or his mom. If you're beefing that up a little to get some compassion, whatever. If you're not, then the problem is clearly between you and your man and it's likely not the first or last time you'll have communication problems. Either the setup was unclear or you were told things that aren't true, but either way this isn't the kid's fault.
Not knowing the specifics of the settlement between your husband and his ex makes it hard for any of us to pick sides, but I know a ton of people who are in similar situations, including myself. But in my case, everyone knew right away that my son spends half his time with me and while a week away here and there for a trip or something is fine, that's the schedule we stick with all year round. And while it might sound judgemental, I can't imagine being a dad who refuses to spend much time with my kid.
And when it comes to actual childcare, the YMCA runs some excellent day camp programs that are week-to-week. Look into them. This kid is going to have a much better time playing with kids his own age, swimming, going on field trips, etc. than hanging out with you.