Free lawn advice from your Forum friends

What are the things that puzzle, enrage, delight and tickle you as you go about your life in Madison?
SombreroFallout
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Re: Free lawn advice from your friend Meade

Postby SombreroFallout » Sat Jun 01, 2013 3:33 am

Enforcing standards for maintaining an attractive yard is a double-edged lawn mower blade. Whether ye sow wild oats or buzz-cut your turfgrass within an inch of its life--your own personal preference just isn't a license for taking issue with somebody else's business on somebody else's land. Or their aesthetics.

Trying to be neighborly in a world full of overbearing huffy-pushy complainers (conformism for you, not them) is an eternally thankless and never-ending job in which YOU do All The Work. But.

Neighborly relations have to come first. Disputes arise between ostensibly reasonable property owners all the time for remarkably petty points, even though they all damn well know that other guy owns . .. private property.

There's little difference in nuisance terms between an uptight, overly-controlling neighbor and your obliviously derelict or absentee landowner.

Don't like that lone dandelion? One too many lawn ornaments? Reaming out the neighbor may feel good, but it may not be worth it in the grand suburban scheme of things. So think twice:

http://tinyurl.com/meotd3n (scroll all the way down, it's cached)
Vilas Scott . ... was aware that Butschke and Richardson had been having some arguments, mainly over things such as Richardson not mowing the lawn or taking care of his side of the property.

http://www.wdtimes.com/news/article_0f7 ... 963f4.html
Richardson told detectives that he and Butschke did not get along well due to issues with the lawn and that Butschke basically had "taken his house away from him."

Meade
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Re: Free lawn advice from your friend Meade

Postby Meade » Sat Jun 01, 2013 8:59 am

I would have just taken over all the lawn mowing and told the landlord to lower my rent.

jjoyce
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Re: Free lawn advice from your friend Meade

Postby jjoyce » Mon Jun 03, 2013 4:20 pm

My favorite thread ever. I haven't even looked at it in a couple weeks, so I entirely missed this:

Mean Scenester wrote:
jjoyce wrote:
nutria wrote:There are few things in this world I find as vain, as unnecessary, and as downright banal as lawn care, especially when it comes to making the perfect square of green carpet so many people seem to obsess over. Sno hit on it earlier -- just go ahead and install astroturf, already.

I'm sure you're spending the time you don't waste on something as banal as yard care producing great art, fiction or music, right?

Right. This from the guy who scoffed at my assertion that time spent obsessing over my lawn is time I'm not spending with my kids.

Question: Who gives a fuck what nutria decides to do if he's choosing to mow every other week (or every third, or whatever) instead of every week or whatever you lawn jockeys do?

I get it, a manicured lawn is a priority for you. Not for me, or, apparently, our friend nutria here. Why does that get your dander up so high? Maybe we're noodling on a guitar. Maybe we're finger painting with our kids. Maybe we're producing only mediocre art and literature. Whatever it is, is going to be a hell of a lot less ephemeral than that monoculture Mother Nature is trying to destroy despite all the elbow grease and chemicals and precious water you may care to throw at it.


Classic thread. I'll point to it in the future when people ask me to describe what went on here.

"I get it..." Do you get it? What is it you claim to get?

snoqueen
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Re: Free lawn advice from your friend Meade

Postby snoqueen » Mon Jun 03, 2013 7:13 pm

Jason, your remark asking if nutria is creating great art in his spare time instead of doing something as banal as lawn care is an unjustifiable leap of questioning based on very iffy reasoning.

Nutria says he finds lawn care vain and the resulting green square of carpet unnecessary. That's all. He can feel that way.

What he'd rather be doing was not part of his argument. It something you put in there expecting him to live up to your personal standards. Maybe he'd rather do nothing but sleep all weekend. Nothing says there exists an economy of weekend time-usage where an hour of mowing can only be traded up for an hour of creating great art. His time is his own and he doesn't have to justify his dislike of one usage by doing something higher on the ladder of honor. You might like lawn care more, he might think catching up on his sleep for the sake of his health is more important. Nobody has the upper hand in an argument like that. It's totally personal choices and preferences.

Then Mean comes back at you with this argument:

Maybe we're producing only mediocre art and literature. Whatever it is, is going to be a hell of a lot less ephemeral than that monoculture Mother Nature is trying to destroy despite all the elbow grease and chemicals and precious water you may care to throw at it.


He's saying maybe we're producing only mediocre art, and I said maybe we're just sleeping. It's the same point. Weekend time is our own to do what we like without measuring it against someone else's accomplishments. That's the beauty of a weekend.

Then he adds a remark about environmental concerns, which is not irrelevant to a discussion on lawn care but is instead a social concern that affects everybody in one way or another.

I think you were the one making the irrelevant or weak point, and I don't see why the discussion is any big example of Forum stupidness. Maybe you could explain better.

Meade
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Free lawn advice from your friend JJoyce

Postby Meade » Mon Jun 03, 2013 8:37 pm

With a serious lump of pride in my throat and with profoundly high expectations for the future of greenness in the budding souls of young lawnboys and girls all across these fruited lands which belong to you and me, I hereby pass to Jason Joyce the baton of Free Lawn Advisor and Authority on All Things Weekend. May he use his power and prestige always for good and never for ill.

Ninja
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Re: Free lawn advice from your friend Meade

Postby Ninja » Mon Jun 03, 2013 9:14 pm

snoqueen wrote:Jason, your remark asking if nutria is creating great art in his spare time instead of doing something as banal as lawn care is an unjustifiable leap of questioning based on very iffy reasoning.
...
I think you were the one making the irrelevant or weak point, and I don't see why the discussion is any big example of Forum stupidness. Maybe you could explain better.


I didn't see any accusations of stupidity in there, but I don't know Joyce's general demeanor towards this place so maybe that's part of a longer running issue. Either way, I find this thread fascinating too because its such a proxy for different personality types banging out a culture the hard way because they have no choice but to deal with eachother. I also tend to invent grand, hairbrained cultural theories based on the interstate driving experiences on road trips, so maybe I'm reading too much into it, but this time I really do think it's about more than the lawns.

I didn't read Joyce's art comment to mean that a person better be making super fantastic contributions to society if they're not working on their lawn. I read it more as a response to the implication (at that point, until it was later made explicitly clear with the "vain" "banal" language) that tending to a lawn was a stupid waste of time. Most of what we do is a stupid waste of time. It's still fun. For us at least. So unless someone is making a serious contribution to the world, why talk shit about how anyone else chooses to spend their time? Maybe I'm wrong, but that's how I took the great art comment. And it was not unprovoked.

nutria
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Re: Free lawn advice from your Forum friends

Postby nutria » Mon Jun 03, 2013 10:24 pm

So, here's what happened. The original title of this thread was "Do you really give a shit about your lawn?" or something like that. My first post, and I quote:
nutria wrote:There are few things in this world I find as vain, as unnecessary, and as downright banal as lawn care, especially when it comes to making the perfect square of green carpet so many people seem to obsess over. Sno hit on it earlier -- just go ahead and install astroturf, already.

FWIW, this imaginary conversation between god and St. Francis on lawn care sums up my feelings on the subject pretty well.


OK, jjoyce, Ninja, take note: this was my personal answer to the OP. Not adressed to anyone. Sometime shortly after my comment, the lawnmower brigade flew off the handle because I didn't tell them how special they were for their bullshit hobby. (I'll point out that quite a few of the Forum's lawn care enthusiasts recognized that my comment had nothing to do with them, and it ignored it thusly. Like adults.)

If I've learned one thing from this thread is that there is a higher degree of correlation than I had suspected between two groups I had formerly considered totally disparate: lawn jockeys and the insecure.

You guys need some fucking perspective.

Ninja
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Re: Free lawn advice from your Forum friends

Postby Ninja » Mon Jun 03, 2013 10:45 pm

nutria wrote:So, here's what happened. The original title of this thread was "Do you really give a shit about your lawn?" or something like that. My first post, and I quote:
nutria wrote:There are few things in this world I find as vain, as unnecessary, and as downright banal as lawn care, especially when it comes to making the perfect square of green carpet so many people seem to obsess over. Sno hit on it earlier -- just go ahead and install astroturf, already.

FWIW, this imaginary conversation between god and St. Francis on lawn care sums up my feelings on the subject pretty well.


OK, jjoyce, Ninja, take note: this was my personal answer to the OP. Not adressed to anyone. Sometime shortly after my comment, the lawnmower brigade flew off the handle because I didn't tell them how special they were for their bullshit hobby. (I'll point out that quite a few of the Forum's lawn care enthusiasts recognized that my comment had nothing to do with them, and it ignored it thusly. Like adults.)

If I've learned one thing from this thread is that there is a higher degree of correlation than I had suspected between two groups I had formerly considered totally disparate: lawn jockeys and the insecure.

You guys need some fucking perspective.


Wow...yeah. How insecure of us. Such a lack of perspective on our bullshit hobby. Sorry for flying off the handle like that.

snoqueen
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Re: Free lawn advice from your Forum friends

Postby snoqueen » Tue Jun 04, 2013 8:25 am

You guys need some fucking perspective.


That's all of us. Let's go argue about guns or something that really makes any difference.

Maybe it's just a summertime thing (I think it is) but the quality of discussion around here -- like the content of the rest of the media -- is going way down and I can't wait for September.

Mean Scenester
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Re: Free lawn advice from your Forum friends

Postby Mean Scenester » Tue Jun 04, 2013 11:41 am

jjoyce wrote:Classic thread. I'll point to it in the future when people ask me to describe what went on here.

So you'll point to it as an example of the moderator not answering the questions directly posed to him in favor of enshrouding himself in a weak haze of sanctimony and misplaced disdain?

p.s. If this is your favorite thread ever, it's probably time you found new work digs.

rabble
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Re: Free lawn advice from your Forum friends

Postby rabble » Tue Jun 04, 2013 1:08 pm

Ninja wrote:
nutria wrote:You guys need some fucking perspective.


Wow...yeah. How insecure of us. Such a lack of perspective on our bullshit hobby. Sorry for flying off the handle like that.

I get it. You're insecure and you enjoy bullshit. Got it.

jjoyce
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Re: Free lawn advice from your friend Meade

Postby jjoyce » Tue Jun 04, 2013 2:37 pm

snoqueen wrote:Jason, your remark asking if nutria is creating great art in his spare time instead of doing something as banal as lawn care is an unjustifiable leap of questioning based on very iffy reasoning.


Using a term like banal elevates the critic. What he does is interesting, what you do is boring. The invocation of "vanity" is even worse, as though anyone who looks over his freshly-mowed lawn is feeling vain. Is shaving an exercise in vanity? Putting on deodorant? How unnecessary!

Saying you don't like to mow is, itself, rather banal, don't you think? Better to try and set yourself apart making a proclamation using no fewer than three adjectives.

But who doesn't recognize that when posted on TDPF, of all places, such a barb becomes even more ridiculous? "While you're wasting your time cutting grass, I'm over here typing out truth on the internet!"

Mean Scenester
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Re: Free lawn advice from your Forum friends

Postby Mean Scenester » Tue Jun 04, 2013 2:46 pm

You're seriously off your nut, dude.

Prof. Wagstaff
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Re: Free lawn advice from your Forum friends

Postby Prof. Wagstaff » Tue Jun 04, 2013 4:09 pm

jjoyce wrote:But who doesn't recognize that when posted on TDPF, of all places, such a barb becomes even more ridiculous? "While you're wasting your time cutting grass, I'm over here typing out truth on the internet!"

Now I'm really confused.
Do you want us to contribute to the Internet Forum you run or not?

nutria
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Re: Free lawn advice from your Forum friends

Postby nutria » Tue Jun 04, 2013 4:13 pm

Ninja wrote:Wow...yeah. How insecure of us. Such a lack of perspective on our bullshit hobby. Sorry for flying off the handle like that.


You know, you're right. You do tend to keep your composure in the face of someone not agreeing with you with regards to the mundane.


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