Little Girl in the Men's Room

What are the things that puzzle, enrage, delight and tickle you as you go about your life in Madison?

Bringing a little girl into a public men's room without notice or knocking?

Sure, no problem. Why are you so uptight?
16
59%
Are you out of your freakin' mind?
11
41%
 
Total votes: 27

Stu Levitan
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Little Girl in the Men's Room

Postby Stu Levitan » Sat Oct 07, 2006 8:10 pm

I was at the urinal in the downstairs men's room at the Center for Contemporary Art this afternoon when a guy sauntered in with his very young daughter (I'd estimate at 5-7 years old). On my way out, I mentioned that it would be a polite thing to do to knock and check before bringing a little girl into a men's room, for all parties concerned. The guy pulled a total attitude on me, and, with great hostility, told me that if I had a problem with the situation, then I was the one with the problem, he had done nothing wrong or inappropriate.

So, fellow forons, what say thee?

(BTW, if you haven't seen the Chuck Close exhibit, you've got till Sunday afternoon.)

donges
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Re: Little Girl in the Men's Room

Postby donges » Sat Oct 07, 2006 8:36 pm

Stu Levitan wrote:So, fellow forons, what say thee?

Well, I imagine that it beats the little girl taking her father into the ladies room.

Ashley
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Postby Ashley » Sun Oct 08, 2006 12:46 pm

I think that it's a normal thing to do. Maybe you are surprised by it because typically mothers bringing their children into the ladies room? I don't see what problems could be caused by it.
Last edited by Ashley on Sun Oct 08, 2006 4:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.

nickled&dimed
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Postby nickled&dimed » Sun Oct 08, 2006 4:00 pm

Well the museum might be ok, but i've heard sometimes there's untoward behavior in the men's room. Or maybe their tap routine is copyrighted or something.

Daisy
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Postby Daisy » Sun Oct 08, 2006 4:50 pm

It would have been polite - and expended little effort - to knock.

bluethedog
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Postby bluethedog » Sun Oct 08, 2006 5:55 pm

Ashley wrote:I don't see what problems could be caused by it.


How about a little girl...scarred for life???

Granted the men's room at this place is probably a few steps above something like the Camp Randall restrooms, but never forget: MEN ARE PIGS!

I'd probably say something similar if one of my buddies brought over his daughter to watch a Packer game at my house (not to use the bathroom, mind you, just to walk into the house). Luckily, my friends have some common sense.

That being said, I'd like to hear what single dads think. I'm not even sure the "knock first" thing would do much good. What other options do you have?

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Postby Billy Shears » Sun Oct 08, 2006 6:08 pm

I would have felt a little odd, and it's taken me this long to figure out that I'm not sure why I don't think putting a little girl where she can watch men she doesn't know, in various stages of peeing, is being nice to the girl or the men in the restroom. I'm pretty sure that it's breaking some sort of taboo but can't be more specific.

And yes, knocking and saying "I'm about to bring a little girl in here" would have made me feel more comfortable about it.

Donald
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Postby Donald » Sun Oct 08, 2006 7:00 pm

This has happend to me,too. I had a daughter, so I don't get too upset by it. If you go camping or hiking a lot with your kid, they generally see you and other men peeing out in nature (back turned), so they think nothing of it. You don't really provide enough information to make a judgement about this instance. For example, was it the girl or the father that relieved themselves?

Under most circumstances, a 5-7 year old girl should not come into a public men's room with her father (I assume this was her father), although I would give some leeway to a 5-year-old coming in. (A pre-school child, no problem.) If it is the father needing to relieve himself, most children of that age in most public environments could be left safely just outside the restroom for a short time. However, you have to understand that there might be circumstances you don't know about. Maybe the girl has some medical/developmental/emotional problem that requires the father to not leave the child alone, or that requires him to assist her if she is the one that has to go. Or maybe she had an accident, or maybe he didn't feel comfortable in the environment leaving her alone. So, I tend to give the benefit of the doubt to the father in these circumstances, because I've been there.

Billy Shears
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Postby Billy Shears » Sun Oct 08, 2006 8:47 pm

Donald wrote:This has happend to me,too. I had a daughter, so I don't get too upset by it. If you go camping or hiking a lot with your kid, they generally see you and other men peeing out in nature (back turned), so they think nothing of it.


I had a daughter too. We also went camping and hiking a lot, and she was accustomed to males wandering a little ways from the group to pee.

As I said, I'm uncertain why it would have bothered me a bit. Not a lot but I would have said something about it to the guy. Maybe I don't like the possibility of accidentally flashing a five year old girl before I knew she was there. Even if that possibility is remote, to her I'm a complete stranger with my dick in my hand and that doesn't seem right to me.

Maybe I'm bothered by the fact that the guy never considers that he might run into someone who likes that sort of thing a little more than they should.

jjoyce
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Postby jjoyce » Sun Oct 08, 2006 9:58 pm

I don't wanna be all polarizing or anything, but this is clearly an area where people with kids feel one way and those without disagree.

I'm lucky in that my only child is the same gender as I am and I don't have yet another issue on my mind when he's gotta go and he's talkin' NOW. Sometimes you don't have the benefit of being able to knock. My kid pretty much holds it until the last possible second, so as a result I know where a lot of public restrooms are located in various parts of town and how to get there in a hurry.

I think one of the big issues is that it's pretty hard to let your kid go to the bathroom by themselves these days. It seems to me that I often stayed home alone at age 7, went into public restrooms by myself and even waited in the car while my mom popped into a store or something. Today, I doubt anyone does those things.

One final thought: Unless it's during a performance, the Overture facilities are often completely empty. Not only that, but they're clean and well lit. Depending on what was going on with this guy at that moment, it might have been the best choice going. Where else are you going to go? Nick's? Cafe Espresso?

I find it much more inappropriate when women simply decide to crash the men's room, which they often do at Camp Randall or various bars/nightclubs.

Billy Shears
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Postby Billy Shears » Sun Oct 08, 2006 10:13 pm

jjoyce wrote:I don't wanna be all polarizing or anything, but this is clearly an area where people with kids feel one way and those without disagree.

I don't want to polarize either, but I have a kid and I disagree.
:)
Or, maybe I'm the only parent here who feels that way. That sure wouldn't be the first time I was on one side and everybody else in the world was on the other.

Maybe what bothers me most is this:
The guy pulled a total attitude on me, and, with great hostility, told me that if I had a problem with the situation, then I was the one with the problem, he had done nothing wrong or inappropriate.


That's bullshit.

towanda
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Postby towanda » Mon Oct 09, 2006 12:18 am

How about a little girl...scarred for life???

Oh, stop it. That's not going to scar anybody.

Oprah
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Postby Oprah » Mon Oct 09, 2006 8:18 am

We must protect the sanctity of the bathroom. If we acquiesce to the immoral whims of fathers who bring their daughters into men's rooms or mothers who bring their sons into women's rooms, we will be breeding a future of men and women who are fascinated with watching the opposite sex defecate, and this is not good for a Christian society. We will become a world where "golden showers" and "eggs Danny Thomas style" run supreme. We must stop this madness before it is too late.

I urge you not only to vote to maintain the sacredness of marriage between a man and a woman but also to demand that your elected representatives amend the constitution to defend our public restrooms.

God bless you and God bless the United States of America.

Love and kisses,

Bishop Robert C. Morlino

evildan
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Postby evildan » Mon Oct 09, 2006 8:37 am

This kind of cross bathroom gander should not be allowed under any circumstances. Little girls should have no idea that men pee. And men should not see little girls while they are peeing.

Besides we don't want women figuring out how we pee standing up... that's a male trade secret.

Seriously though, he's a parent, he did what he had to. Any parent knows that children are naturally afraid of going to the bathroom in a public places. And when you gotta go, you gotta go.

Interesting side note, I believe I saw a "Family" restroom at the Monona Terrace - I'm assuming that it was created to prevent just such a situation.

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Postby cristobal » Mon Oct 09, 2006 8:51 am

Depends on your age estimate, I think. One of my girls is 4 1/2 and, depending on the situation, she goes by herself or I take her into the mens room. More often I take her into the mens room, I guess.

Frankly, the mens room is often pretty nasty and I want no part of the stalls there -- yech.

Anyway I would think that by age 6 a girl should be able to use the women's bathroom by herself. If it seems like a questionable situation (two exits, creepy or whatever), then it's still reasonable to hit the mens room.

Anyway men stand facing the urinals, pee, then zip up. The mens room is a temple of silence punctuated only by echoing farts. We're not swearing, making sweet love, comparing our penis sizes, or doing much of anything offensive.

Cristobal


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